Women for Women : “Struggling with a kind of separation anxiety” / Amanda Magee

Once in a while we spot a certain type of article. One that gets to the heart of what it is all about – our children.

“When Everyone Else Is Divorcing” is one of those articles – you should try to find some time to read it, reread it and put into practice Amanda’s very fine advice.

Separation Anxiety: When Everyone Else Is Divorcing http://t.co/C0WCjBuhou

— Will Corry (@slievemore) August 21, 2013

The girls have been struggling with a kind of separation anxiety lately. There have been more than five announcements of separations/divorce from couples they know over the last year. When it first began, it was easy enough to gently explain that sometimes, like with being sisters, you need to get a little space or take a break. They would nod softly, ask if Sean and I were okay, and then move on to the next thing.

I was hanging out with Finley one day and she said, “Mom, do I have a stepmom?”

I shook my head, looked down at her, and said, “What, babe?” She stopped walking, turned to me, and repeated, “Do I have a stepmom?” I knelt down and said, “No, Fin, you don’t have a stepmom. I am married to dad and you are our kid, so you have a mom and a dad, no stepmom.” She thought about it, “Will I ever?”

I took a deep breath, being the weeper and worrier that I am, my mind immediately went to the place of early death. What if I die and she does end up with a stepmom? What I say now might influence how she deals with that person. I said, “Well, I kind of hope not, because that would mean that I wasn’t here anymore. So I kind of think no, but if you ever did, I would hope that she was nice.” She thought about it, “So not like the Tangled mom, you wouldn’t want a person who would steal my sparkle, right?” I was teetering between crying and laughing. “Exactly.” She nodded, satisfied, and we walked toward the car.

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photo credit: One Way Stock via photopin cc

photo credit: Greens MPs via photopin cc