A restaurateur has shot to infamy after posting a hilariously honest job advert on Gumtree. All that is known of the businessman is that he is an American named Justin.
The advert for the opening at a new eatery in Clarkston, East Renfrewshire starts by telling applicants that: “I have no problem working seven days a week, but on the off-chance I break my foot or get third-degree steam burns on my face I need someone who can work unsupervised and still make quality food … I need a second in command to bang out a ton of semi-fancy food in a kitchen the size of a closet, and you also have to put up with my wife because I do, and she’s the real boss.”
He intends to open a diner that offers egg-centric breakfast and sandwiches, although he implores that “There are no eggs benedicts,” and fends off any idle candidates by adding: “If your idea of a good sandwich is a tuna mayo like your gran makes then please don’t bother responding.”
Succinct covering letters and CVs are encouraged, with the brusque businessman implying that previous recruitment processes have involved reading too many prolix applications: “If you have one that says you’re a ‘hard-working team player that can also function well alone’ and that you ‘value customer service and punctuality’ I will stab myself in the face with a pencil and nobody will get a job … Last time I was hiring for a place I got over 400 CVs. You know how long it takes to read 400 CVs? Too damned long. So don’t waste anyone’s time.”
On the subject of pay – £7 an hour for up to 55 hours – he simply says “The money is s**t. That’s the best I can do. I’m dead serious about the money thing. Don’t come to an interview and then say it sounds great but you’ve got your kid’s school clothes to buy or whatever. You’ll literally be making more than me because I am essentially working for free until the place is paid off.”